One thing I like about England is the train system.
One thing I don't like about England is the train system.
Last weekend I went to visit a friend in the south of England. I caught the Friday night train to
Peterborough. I should preface this by saying that I ride the train quite a bit, and it is my main source of transport for long distance travel. On average, train rides are quiet and peaceful. This is one thing I love about Britain, is that people keep their conversations in public to a minimum, and usually at a nice quiet level. I have yet to master this trick... that being said...
On Friday night I was assaulted with such a
cacophony of annoying sounds that if each part
hadn't melded perfectly with the others to form a symphony of
disastrous irritation so hyperbolic that I found it amusing, I might have been very put out. As it was, there were too many to not laugh. The man sitting next to me was reading a book and seemed to also be trying to chew off his fingernails and then a straw, and then for dessert a pencil... constantly for the 2 hour ride. There was a little girl of maybe 3 that would periodically start screaming. There was some
ambiance music from some undisclosed boom box. Though I think my favorite was the fact that the door that
separates the carriages from the open area between phone friendly zone
between carriage seemed to be un-close-able. This meant that my end of the carriage was privy to the rantings of a crazy
chavy woman, the likes of which I have never heard. I almost went to tell her: you know, we can hear you. I just hope the gut that hot pink tank top was poorly concealing was from beer and not from a baby. Lord help us. I think you must know the type of conversation I overheard. Here are a few snippets:
in a really
whiny and off and on again yelling volume picture this:
Well
fiiiiiine then, tell him I will get a taxi, no, I will just get a taxi,
urhg, then don't pick me up, I don't want to talk about it, I DON'T want to talk about it, ugh, fine,
geez, ugh, I said we will when I get there, ugh,
noo-
wa,
yesssssssssss. Fine. no. fine"
then she makes another phone call and now picture giggling:
Oh my God, I know, I know!
hahahaha, I know! I can't believe it,
yah, and he was all like, and then we said, no
yah, I'll be there,
yeh, on the train,
yah,
haha, he is such a _____"
and so it went...
alternating... for over an hour. It was too funny to find it annoying, plus I was on my way to spend a weekend with friends, had good music on my
Zune, and Mort by Terry Pratchett to drown out the circus surrounding me.
I returned to Leeds on a Monday morning train, and was sitting at a table with 3 very polite teenage boys, well two were teenagers, and one was a
pre-teen. They kind of resembled my brother-in-law's brothers, Patrick, Ely and Gregory.. which endeared me to them immediately. They read their books and magazines about music and sat quietly the entire journey. It was blissful.